Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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