oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
