So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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