can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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