We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
