All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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