Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
you never un-have a 4some
Randomize
