She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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