Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
