come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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