just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just pee around me
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
we're so committed to being not committed
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize