hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
