Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
