none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
