Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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