I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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