This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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