I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
