i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Randomize
