That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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