Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
