i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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