I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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