I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize