yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
