i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
