Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
