she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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