I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
