Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
