A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
