very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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