Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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