youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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