the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
How does one acquire holy water?
We need to get me chipped asap
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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