I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
