Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
