My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
