CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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