will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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