the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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