Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
