Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize