i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Randomize