Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
