I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
