People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
