I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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