Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
