I am in a vortex of obligation.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
