Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize